THE ULTIMATE PLACEMENTS

The following is a report based on the increasing profits and continuous growth in this industry. All aspiring engineering students can look forward to it, though lesser vacancies for students from commerce and medical sectors.

The company has a great turnover each day and we hope that it shall become a major employing firm even in times of recession. Let us have an overview on the future prospects in this wonder full company

Name:  OM XEROX PHOTOCOPY CENTER

Established:  UNKNOWN

CEO:  AKKKA

Aim:  to become a major photocopying and printing giant in Campus

Recruitment needs and future prospects :::

Branch                        Job description                            Pay                                          

Mechanical                maintenance of machines, upkeep of the              3 meals a day

                                          Shop

Electronics &             operating photocopy machines, checking             2 meals + snacks   

Communications         lighting systems of the machines                                

Electrical Engineering   electricity connections for machines, hoarding         1 meal +snacks

                                   Lights, fans, AC’s, tube lights and emergency

                                   Back up.

                                        

Automobile                  CEO’s  driver                                                    Tea (at tea stalls)

Aeronautical            making aeroplanes of the waste paper                     2 Oreo     

                                                                                                                               

Printing Tech.          Taking print outs for customers                          breakfast+snacks

Civil Engg.                Called as per need, no job security                         Water

Computer              operating net & scanner, giving prints                           dinner + milk                      

PLEASE NOTE THE FOLLOWING :

·         The above jobs have no scope for future promotions

·         Salary may vary as per the work done

·         Selection purely on the basis of merit.

·         Recruitments to be done by the CEO.

·         Decision of the CEO shall remain final, unless any unavoidable circumstances occur






DREAM PLACEMENTS:
 At DeeTee..where you need to have good communication skills in order to "attract" customers. pay includes free booze and lots of NSP

·         Commerce students may apply for cash counter

·         Medical students for CEO’s personal health advisor

           Compiled by: Abhay Maheshwari, Ayush Sood, Anshuman Sharma

confused of calling life a race???..

i got this very interesting mail, long time back..thought to share with all of you...its time that we all stop cribbing and accept the scenario and the system we live in...have a read...

Why life is a race, can’t it be a peaceful journey?  A big question before all of us…..

Always at every point of life, we compete with others to win and retain our position in the society.

From the birth of a child, initially he is forced by the parents and teachers and they are themselves forced by the society itself, to win and become topper in every competitions and studies. Then after completing education and having a job, he compete with his collogues. Then, the competition to get high position in the society in terms of money, reputation, standard, facilities e.t.c. the competition is still not over when he grows old, then he do competition between his children and other’s children and the process continues……..all this is forced by the society, and we blame the society for that. I want to ask one question-what is society actually? Isn’t it made of us only? Aren’t we blaming ourselves.

I am not saying that race is bad, infact race is important for our development and progress of humans and thus society.

But race is necessary to a certain extent and its excess can be very dangerous for us. In its excess, a man become selfish to such a great extent that he started thinking of himself only and as a consequence of it, all his friends, relatives start leaving him alone and at the end, he become such isolated and alone that he has nobody to talk to, nobody to share his feelings e.t.c and then he feel his life a burden on himself and become unhappy and sad.

Remember that happiness comes in giving more without selfishness and not in getting something.

So, we should compete but we should not be jealous and selfish. then the life will be healthy and peaceful race for us…………………….        

plants dont grow automatically, they compete for their survival..the universe always wants the best to stay..the older slowly dies off...thats the law of universe..every one has to run in this race..

 i saw this perfect thought that we all must remember.... 

                  " GO SLOW...BUT NEVER STOP"